I’ve recently started talking to this guy…
Now, I had no intention of actually liking him but he’s different than my previous guys.
I usually get the bad boys and guys that treat me like a piece of meat or a trophy but he’s different, he’s actually nice to me.
I’m not dating again until October but I kind of like this guy. He is respectful, homely, handsome but doesn’t flaunt it, and just really nice to me in a way that I can’t explain and I think only girls who have experience with dating the wrong kind of guys would understand. He is a goofball just like me and a little shy which I can understand because I’m shy too. He’s not going to dump me because I won’t put out, he doesn’t sleep around. All in all, he’s the kind of guy you rarely see at my age, the kind of guy parents would love and brothers would get along with. He has a good head on his shoulders. Most dads don’t want to give away their daughters but having met him, would gladly walk her down the isle to him. You get the picture.
I would like to tell him that I like him but a lot of thoughts are going through my head right now telling me why that would be a bad idea.
- He’s in the Air Force and going to Italy in a few months so there’s no point
- I’ve been with the wrong kind of guys so much that I think some of their bad habits have rubbed off on me so I don’t deserve a nice guy like him. Plus I’m not that innocent and I have a history of bitchy behavior.
- His feelings won’t be reciprocated and there goes our friendship
- I still have a few more months of no dating. He may have just served a purpose to instill hope in me again.
Those are the reasons that keep running through my head. I know it’s mostly my anxiety but in actuality these reasons do sound kind of legit.
I’ve had an experience like this before, there was this guy I liked in high school who I never had the guts to actually get. He did like me and I knew that but still my fear stopped me from actually doing anything about it.
This situation is similar but different,
- He is going to Italy so there is no point. But on the other hand I have friends who have been in long distance relationships, one of them is now engaged to her long distance lover. I’ll never know unless I give it a try…right?
- I have settled for the wrong types of guys because I honestly believed that there are no decent men my age anymore and if they are my age and decent they want to marry way too soon for me. I don’t think I deserve a nice guy because I wasn’t always a nice girl, I’ve talked about that before. But just because I’ve lowered my standards does that mean I don’t deserve a guy who actually meets my original standards? Is he worth letting go of? And should I allow my past to define my future?
- I talked to my friend about this one and he said, ‘you have to make an executive decision. do you want another friend or a boyfriend? go big or go home.’ I really have enjoyed this kid’s company and talking to him I don’t think I want to ruin a friendship. On the other hand, I have enough friends and like I said, I don’t think he’s a guy I want to slip.
- I do still have a few months of no dating but a guy like him is a true diamond in the rough. Plus he came around right when I had given up on finding a guy like him as if it was God saying, ‘don’t give up on me, I know what you want and I’ve heard you.’ Regardless of whether me and him end up together I will always remember this message. And just because I tell him I like him it doesn’t mean we’ll start dating.
I like to live by the motto: No regrets. No what ifs.
If I don’t tell this guy I like him I will definitely wonder what if, at least if it doesn’t work out I’ll know. BUT if it ruins our friendship I’ll definitely regret it.
I’ve prayed for help and for God to hold my hand through this. That may sound silly to some people but you don’t understand how anxious this makes me lol.
So I’m asking you for help too now, should I tell him or not? Cast your vote!